Saturday 30 June 2012

The question isn’t who’s going to let me, the question is who’s going to stop me.

I woke up the the new numbers of 158.6 I was to tired to dance with joy but it made me real happy. Tomorrow I hope to be fasting. Mainly cause today went to shit. Sigh. I didn't eat a lot but it still made me feel sick. Lately whenever I eat it make me feel sick. No clue why. Has happened for the last three or four days but its cool. Helped me get to this new weight! Tomorrow i have a list of things to do to keep me busy. Includes going to buy some summer bottoms. Pants are just to hot. I was looking at some and found a pair I really like so. Then I will be cleaning out my car and fixing up my room. Hopefully I will get some laundry in when I'm done. After all the work is done I will reward myself with some Korean dramas and the go to bed. Going to try to cut out all soda. Just water. Also I want to stop eating candy and sugar. I don't eat a lot of it now but i would like to stop completely. Having a lot of trouble dealing with people lately. Just don't want to be around anyone. I want to be left alone but i cant. I have work and family. And everyone is fighting at work. Plus my mom is kind of needy and my father is....well he is my father. If you don't want to talk he gets pissy. A girl got hurt at work on Friday. Some friends at work and i took her some flowers. I so enjoyed seeing her smile when she saw them.
Love Jane

Friday 29 June 2012

Mean people suck

So this guy at work V was such an ass to me. So my friends at work reported him for harassment....ya it was bad. But normaly i dont tell people when someone is harassing me so it was weird. Have not ate today. dont even feel like eating. My weight was 161.0 pounds. My hair was wet and i had food and water in me. Might be around 160 then so. Soon ill be in the 150's. Wish me luck ^_^

Wednesday 27 June 2012

INTERNET!!

Hello beautiful people, I finally have a computer to use at home and a time to update. Its night right now so i have to be careful my parents are home. But I will let you know how my day went. For food i had about....4-500 calories. So pretty good. I did a fast but broke it yesterday....I felt so gross. yesterday...was bad...i didn't eat a lot its just what i did eat was...unhealthy. Ill try a fast again soon though. I hate it when i have no choice but to eat. Grr. So i made a new rule - only eat when there is no other choice. That's hardly ever so i should be OK. I stopped running. I can never run on my period. So I'm going to try zumba or something after work. I have been hanging out with my friend H a lot lately. N has a girlfriend (not me) now P is out of my life. And B is...well B. F is a new guy....has a girlfriend though. Normally when a guy has a girl i don't feel anything but for some reason with him i do. I am starting to tell people about my past abuse too. No guys just a few girls. I told them that's why i don't want to or like to be touched unless I'm close enough with a person. I am so tired of work right now. It was drama all day today. Just...no. But i do get paid Sunday. I plan to buy some pants or something that are a little tight but i can still wear and just loss weight so they are loss. Then buy another pair. I bought a nice journal that i plan to wright letters to Ana in. I read it as a tip somewhere so i hope it helps. Also i need a hair cut so if I get to 155 Ill have it as a reward and get a trim. Hopefully with having a computer i will just forget to eat. Also i need to remember to clear the history so my mom doesn't find this one like she did the last. I had it made on that one. So many friends and people to trust and now it is gone. Good night-Jane