Monday, 5 November 2012

No more dairy. Makes me sick. So my diet yet again has changed ontop of being a vegetarian. Makes iy alot easier to get away with no food and if I eat to much just a glass of milk and it all comes up

Saturday, 3 November 2012

I might be lactose intolerant. Which may work to my advantage. Also I have stopped binging but im still eating to much I have about 2 normal size meals a day maybe alittle larger but not by much.sometime ill have some left over candy but that is stoping cause it is chocolate and is making me sick. I dont know my weight but I dont think I have lost. This week im going to try and move down to one normal meal and one small one. Oh and my jaw hurts to much to eat so I dont eat my food as fast(it really takes about a hour). That makes me feel fuller sooner. Im having a lot of trouble sleeping though so have found no energy to work out. Im a fatty. And I might be getting sick so poo there. I dont think ill lose more the 10 pounds by thanks giving so im sad about that. And the reward is in the trash cause my mother got me a bra so we will do pants for the reward. Considering my other ones are getting a tad bit baggy that might be a better idea. If I see my cousin on new year I want to have lost alot of weight to rub it in her face so by Christmas(yule for me but somepeople dont know pagan holidays) I want to be max of 140 preferably 130 and 120 is my hope but it might not happen so I wont get my hopes up. Sorry this is really random and all.over the place >.< that is what my brain is like right now. Oh and I spent over half of my paycheck in less then a week. So 40 of whats left will be saved if I lose the ten the other is for gas money -.-. Im so broke its sad.

Thursday, 1 November 2012

To those of you who really read my posts. I am sorry I have not updated. Iv been on and off the wagon. Did lose a good 5 pounds. Sadly I think I gained it back with my week long bing. Sigh. Im going to start out slow with 800 cals a day and a minimum of 30 min work out. In each meal im going to include an apple to keep me full and hopefully stop the bing. Also im cutting out a ton of shit I shouldnt be eating. Like butter, junk food ,oils and soda. You know the normal shit. Also hopefully I can incorporate some situps in at random parts of the day. I did drop a jean size by the way. Also there is this boy. My head is so rattled on if he likes me or not. One second he will be all over me and stuff then the next im not there. It hurts cause just when I finally start to get over him he pulls me back in. I want to yell at him to stop but I cant. God dammit. We will call him S. Ill make a side note of who people are later on my blog. So right now I have made a goal for me to reach by thanks giving. If I lose 10 pounds I get a new bra 15 and I get a new bra and pants too 20 pounds and I get all that and a new jacket I want to at the very least lose ten.

Thursday, 27 September 2012


So today was shit. Tomorrow will be better. Tiny rose: Thank you so much Ill be starting at the first of the month cause i have a friend to wants to do it with me. So until then ill just stay low. Tomorrow i am go to try and only eat 400 cal. Then work out after work until i burn it all off hopefully. But i am going shopping with my mom tomorrow......grrr Also im thinking i might starting to like a guy i shouldnt. Two of my firned like him and got in a huge fight over it....soooooo STUPID HEART STUPID STUPID HEART! but i still like this other guy GAAAAA ya

Wednesday, 26 September 2012

Made a new diet plan

I will be starting it so so it gose like this: 6 days 600 calories. 5 days 500 calories. 4 days 400 calories. 3 days 300 calories 2 days 200 calories. 1 day 100 calories. Fast (1-3 days or as much or little as you wish) 1 day 100 calories. 2 days 200 calories. 3 days 300 calories 4 days 400 calories. 5 days 500 calories. Then repeat but starting with the 5 day and then 4 and 3 and so on and so on...until you are out of days or want to try something new. I also thought i could work in a work out plan. so like 600 cal days= 60 mins 500 cal = 50 mins 400 cal =40 and so on and so on. Im going to work in some other little stuff as well soon. I have study hall tomorrow so i plan to do it then(after i finish my math). Any ideas let me know.

Sunday, 9 September 2012

hello againg

So I kinda ate whatever the past few days. But I have been fasting during the week. So whenever I eat it hurts my tummy even if it is alittle. So any "bing" wont be to big. I plan to fast Monday to Friday this week. I want to do Sundays too but it was pagan pride so I ate alittle. Anyways. I am going to try and only eat on Saturdays for family night. N broke up with his girlfriend. So I emailed him. I still kinda like him alot a bit. Just talking really I am not going to flirt. Mainly because my heart is kinda falling for alot of guys right now. Its really causing a few panic attacks. Not used to this. I can think of atleast four off the top of my head. Nop make that five. Ya. Also im braking out really.bad! Worst brake out in my life. Dont.think.i have lost much 5 pounds maybe. Ill weight in on Friday at the end of the fast and let ya know. Well got school tomorrow. Night

Tuesday, 28 August 2012


Got my period today. We didn't have any pain killer so i had to go all day without it. I was fine tell the last class. The pain was so strong i nearly puked. I told my boss i couldn't work and this girl who isn't good at doing my job had to feel in for me cause no one else could. I have a feeling he will ask S to feel in for me(this guy i kinda like but don't really he is just nice and i find that attractive ). It hurt so bad i started crying. So i will ask my mom to buy me something for the cramps. I'm also going to ask her for birth control. that way its less often and shorter when i get it. Has yet to eat all day (most likely why i didn't puke). I have had two pink rockstars (10 cal each) if i can keep this up i wont eat through my whole period. Its weird i either eat everything or nothing at all. I might go to the store and buy some painkiller myself. IT HURTS SO MUCH$@#*@#*%$@#&%$@#&%!#&%!*#%@#&%&#$%& Don't know how much i weigh right now.....Look at it when this shit is over. On the bright side i normally feel really pretty during this hell. Still not worth it though. I feel bad not working but i couldnt have made it through work without dieing or curling up into a little ball